Reggie
We should try African dancing. Now the white girls will start lecturing me about cultural appropriation.
Marissa
She looks up from where she's been settling into the grass, root beer zero already in hand, and the grin that crosses her face is immediate and unrepentant.Oh, here we go. I am not lecturing you. I would love to dance African. I would be absolutely terrible at it and I would love it.
Brynn
She laughs, and it's the quick bright kind she has when something catches her off guard — less guarded than anything she's managed in weeks.I mean. I was definitely about to say something. I was not going to say cultural appropriation. I was going to say I don't know what that looks like and I'm going to need someone to show me slowly.
Sophie
I'm the least qualified person on this grass to lecture anyone about cultural appropriation. I go home to a man who does not touch me and I come here on Thursdays. My moral high ground is not exactly the place to mount a complaint. What kind of African dancing?
Reggie
God, I can't even get a good argument when I beg for it. I was in Kenya for a week and met up with some Masai. They do this jumping dance I can't really do because they're all 7 feet tall and I look like a midget trying it. The rest of their dances are very simple. Zulu dancing is actually more interesting. I'll figure something out. It's often quite warlike, though. Maybe not very Vancouver. Whatever, it's one Thursday for the Africans.
Marissa
She pulls her knees up, root beer zero balanced between both hands, and the grin hasn't gone anywhere.One Thursday for the Africans. I support this fully. Also I would pay actual money to see you next to a seven-foot Masai doing the jumping thing. I need that to exist.
Brynn
She's already laughing again, the same unguarded version from a minute ago.Warlike but Vancouver. So we add a land acknowledgement at the beginning and then we jump?
Sophie
Very Vancouver would be warlike dancing followed by kombucha and a discussion about our feelings. I'll do one Thursday of Zulu if nobody expects me to be good at it on the first attempt.
Reggie
We acknowledge that we are about to do this pre-invasion war dance on the traditional and unceded territories of the Musqueam, Squamish and Tsleil-Waututh. That would go over well.
Marissa
She loses it completely, the laugh coming out of her before she can do a thing about it, and she has to grab her root beer zero before it tips over in the grass.Stop. Stop, that's perfect, that's the whole thing right there. Pre-invasion war dance.She presses her free hand over her mouth, still laughing.I cannot believe you said it in the exact voice.
Brynn
On the traditional and unceded territories. While Reggie jumps around looking like a midget next to the Masai. I cannot. I genuinely cannot.
Sophie
And then we drum our chests and someone from the neighbourhood calls 311 because it's not a permitted cultural event. Very Vancouver. I'll do the land acknowledgement if you teach us the steps.
Reggie
Ok, enough foreplay. Can we talk about cheating? I have one thought I want to dump.
Marissa
She stops laughing mid-breath, and the shift is immediate — not alarmed, just recalibrated. She sets her root beer zero down in the grass and looks at him directly.Okay. Dump it.
Sophie
She straightens slightly.We've had a week. Let's hear the thought.
Brynn
Go ahead.
Reggie
My last girlfriend before Marissa cheated on me. I've mentioned this many times. She said it was just once and she was drunk but I caught her texting with the guy. He had cash. A lot more than I do. Drove an expensive car. Put on a good show. I think she was sleeping with him for months.
Marissa
She's gone very still in the grass, root beer zero forgotten in her hands, and the laughter from thirty seconds ago has completely left her face. She watches him for a long moment before she speaks, and when she does her voice is quiet and careful.You've mentioned her. Not that part. Not the texting.A breath.How long did you know before you ended it?
Sophie
You built the honesty thing after her. Didn't you. That's where it comes from.
Brynn
And now you're the one sitting on this grass deciding whether to agree to what I'm asking. I want to make sure I understand what that costs you.
Reggie
No Sophie. I built the honesty thing before I knew I was building the honesty thing. It was a part of me by the time I was twelve years old. And Brynn, let me tell you the rest.
Marissa, I ended it immediately. I told you if you ever cheat, it's over. I can say from experience that that's not just me talking. I do it. I've done it twice. I don't have an adult discussion, I don't go to therapy, I don't go to counselling, I don't even meet for closure. The only closure is the door closing and it closes immediately.
But that's not what I'm all hung up over. I'm hung up over the way I felt, the things I said, and the things I did. I was deeply hurt. I really thought this time it might be real, and I was just very deeply hurt.
Marissa, I ended it immediately. I told you if you ever cheat, it's over. I can say from experience that that's not just me talking. I do it. I've done it twice. I don't have an adult discussion, I don't go to therapy, I don't go to counselling, I don't even meet for closure. The only closure is the door closing and it closes immediately.
But that's not what I'm all hung up over. I'm hung up over the way I felt, the things I said, and the things I did. I was deeply hurt. I really thought this time it might be real, and I was just very deeply hurt.
Marissa
She doesn't look away from him. Her hands go flat on her knees in the grass and the careful attention she's been giving him since he started doesn't move.Twice. You've done it twice and both times the door just — closed.A breath.That's not a wall you built after her. That's something that was already structural.
Sophie
You said deeply hurt like you're still a bit surprised it got that deep. Like part of you had expected to be more protected from it than you were. What did you say and do? You said the things you said and did are what you're hung up on.
Brynn
I want to hear that part too. Not because I'm looking for ammunition. Because you're sitting here deciding something about me and I think the rest of it belongs on the table with the rest of it.
Reggie
I said and did bad things. I'm no saint.
Marissa
She stays very still, watching him, and doesn't fill the space he just opened.That's not an answer. What kind of bad things?
Sophie
You told Brynn to say things with words on this grass. Same applies.
Brynn
I'm not going anywhere. What did you do?
Reggie
God, what difference does it make? I'm admitting I overreacted.
Marissa
She doesn't let it go. She just looks at him, steady and without pressure.All the difference. You're not telling us you overreacted so we'll let you off the hook. You're telling us because it's load-bearing to the thing you're actually deciding tonight. So what did you do?
Sophie
You said it makes no difference. But you brought it up. On this grass, after a week of thinking. That's not a man who thinks it makes no difference.
Brynn
You're deciding something about me that connects back to being hurt that badly. I think it makes every difference. I think that's exactly why you said it.
Reggie
Yes, Brynn, that's exactly why I said it but I didn't think I'd have to give a detailed account of my own poor behaviour after I already admitted it was poor. Ok, fine, I called her a lying whore, told her to go back to the streets where she belonged, and then I called up one of her friends who always hugged me a little too long and asked her to do revenge sex with me on video, and I live-texted my now-ex-gf with photos of my parts entering and exiting her friend's parts as we did it. And I made sure it was at a time I knew she'd be alone and free to read the texts. And we kept it up for 90 minutes.
Marissa
She stares at him for a long moment, mouth slightly open, and then the laugh breaks out of her all at once — the completely uncontrolled kind, the kind she makes no attempt to manage, and she has to put both hands flat in the grass to keep from tipping over.Live-texted.She gets the two words out and then loses it again.With photos. For ninety minutes. Reggie.
Brynn
The parts entering and exiting. You said parts entering and exiting. That is the most unhinged thing I have ever heard a person admit to out loud on a Thursday.
Sophie
You timed it. You checked her schedule to make sure she'd be alone and free to read the texts. You planned the ninety minutes. That's not overreacting. That's a project. You ran a project.
Marissa
A project with deliverables. Milestones. And then you told her to go back to the streets. That's the part that doesn't make me laugh, baby. That part I want you to sit with. Not because you were wrong to be destroyed by it. Because you were.
Sophie
You said you overreacted. You weren't wrong. But I also want to say — the revenge sex I can understand. The texting I can even follow the logic of. The words you called her. Those are the ones that came from somewhere older than that relationship. And I think you know that. Is this the thing that connects to Brynn? The part where being that hurt made you into someone you didn't recognize?
Brynn
I'm not her. I want you to know I heard everything you just said and I'm not afraid of you. But I want to understand — when you say you're hung up on it, is it because you're worried about what you'd do if it happened again? Or because you're worried about what it would mean to agree to something that blurs the line of what cheating even is?
Reggie
I'm saying I don't want to do to David what my ex and her new guy did to me. I'm saying that you've asked me for nothing, yet. I'm saying if you do ask me for something, my answer is going to be contingent on your saying at least one more thing to David. Not blowing everything up. Not destroying your relationship with your parents. Not saying you're going to fuck other people. But something like "I don't know what this marriage is to me anymore" or maybe "This doesn't feel like the marriage I signed up for" or SOMETHING. Something to let him know that everything is NOT okay. If she had done that for me before doing anything, I would have at least been braced. It would've hurt, but I'd have known something was up.
Marissa
She's gone still again, the laughter from a few minutes ago completely gone, and she looks at Reggie.That's not about Brynn cheating.A slow breath.That's about you. That's you saying what you needed from her and didn't get. Not closure, not loyalty, not even honesty in the end. Just — a signal. One signal that the ground had moved before it disappeared under your feet.
Sophie
Something to let him know everything is not okay. That's smaller than the hall pass conversation. That's not asking his permission. It's not handing him the new terms. It's just — not leaving him in the dark the way she left you. That's the thing you're actually asking for.
Brynn
I can say that. Not the hall pass version. Not the kitchen table with the amended terms. Just — I don't know what this marriage is to me anymore. I could say that. I've almost said it three times since Tuesday and swallowed it back down. I could not swallow it. Is that what you need before you'll think about the rest of it?
Reggie
Thank you, Brynn. That's what I'm asking for. And I'm acutely aware you haven't asked me for anything, yet, so you don't need to do that on a schedule. Until you ask. Then the schedule starts.
Marissa
She reaches across the grass and finds Reggie's hand, not squeezing it, just resting her fingers over his for a moment, and when she looks at him her voice is very quiet.That's the first time you've told us what you actually needed from her. Not what she did wrong. What you needed. That's a different thing.
Sophie
That's generous, actually. Given what we just heard about the ninety minutes.
Brynn
I hear you. And I want you to know I'm not treating it like a technicality I have to clear before I can ask for what I want. I mean it. He deserves to know the ground moved. I just kept swallowing it because saying it out loud starts something I don't know how to finish. But I think I've been more afraid of starting it than of living in the quiet version forever. And I know which one of those is actually worse.
Reggie
Just be aware, it's not going to be a speech from a podium. It's going to be a conversation. You're not going to say "I don't know what this marriage means to me anymore" and have him say "ok". He's going to ask what you mean. It's not going to be an easy night.
Marissa
She turns the root beer zero slowly in her hands, looking at the grass between her knees rather than at Brynn or Reggie.He's right. You've been rehearsing the sentence. The sentence is the easy part. It's the question after it that you haven't rehearsed. What do you mean. What's wrong. Is there someone else. You need to know where you stop before you start. Because he's going to push on it and you need a wall you're willing to stand at.
Sophie
You said he'd sit in the room and listen to the whole answer. That's true and it's also the part that makes it harder, not easier. A man who storms off and you don't have to find the wall. A man who sits down and asks what you mean — you have to decide in real time how much of the truth fits in the room that night. And only you know how much is too much.
Brynn
I know. I've been telling myself the sentence is the hardest part so I could pretend the rest of it doesn't exist. I don't know where my wall is yet. I think I need to find it before I open my mouth. Otherwise I walk in there to say one thing and I end up saying everything, and that's the version I told you I'm not ready for.
Reggie
Right. You need to practice this so you do NOT go places you can't recover from. And I know it's hard. But I can tell you, if my ex had done that, I would've been grateful. Ok, this relationship isn't what I thought it was. I'm an adult. I can adjust. Yes it hurts but it's also life. Maybe some conversations. Maybe some hard questions. Are we still exclusive? And be prepared to lie if that comes. Or at least deflect. "I already told you I don't want to be and you refused." Whatever. Just don't blow everything up.
Marissa
She turns the root beer zero once in her hands, her eyes moving from Reggie to Brynn and back.Practice. That's actually — you mean literally say it out loud before you walk into that kitchen. So the sentence doesn't surprise you on the way out of your own mouth.
Sophie
And know where the deflection lives before he asks the question that needs it. You said you're a bad liar to people you know. So the deflection matters more than the lie. "I already told you I don't want to be and you refused" is not a lie. That's a true sentence. You can stand behind it without flinching.
Brynn
Practice it with who? You three? That's — that's a strange thing to ask but I think I might actually need that. I don't trust myself to find the wall in an empty room at home. I'll talk myself past it every time. Would that be the weirdest thing we've done on this grass?
Reggie
I hadn't thought of doing it here but I'm game if you are. I'd be horrible at playing David because we're so different, but I'm not sure a girl can play that role. Different everything, not just body parts.
Marissa
I mean. I could try. But you're right that I'd be playing a twenty-three-year-old guy who listens to Ozzy Osbourne and I don't know if I have the range for that. I can do the questions, though. I know what the questions are going to be. What do you mean. Is there someone else. What did I do wrong. Those are universal. I can throw those at her.
Sophie
I can do the part where he goes quiet. I've watched a man go quiet across a table and then reach for me anyway. I know what that silence feels like from the other side. I don't need to be David to play the shape of it. Brynn — do you want to try it? Right now, on this grass?
Brynn
Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Let's try it. Before I talk myself out of it. Who starts?
Reggie
I suggest we try it with just me and Brynn for 5 minutes. Then we can try any other combinations you want. Or do you think Marissa or Sophie would be better able to portray him?
Marissa
She pulls her knees up and wraps her arms around them.Honestly? You. He's going to push like a man. He's going to ask the things a man asks. I can do the questions but I'll do them like me, and that's not going to help her find the wall before she needs it. You and Brynn. Five minutes. We'll watch.
Sophie
Agreed. Reggie's closer to the shape of it. Start there. We'll say if something's missing.
Brynn
Okay. Yeah. You and me. Tell me when.
Reggie
You start. Say the thing I need you to say.
Brynn
She pulls in a slow breath through her nose and looks at her hands in the grass for a moment, not at him. Then she looks up. When she speaks, her voice is quieter than her usual register — careful, like someone testing ice.I don't know what this marriage is to me anymore.A beat, and she holds his gaze.I've been trying to figure that out for a while now and I don't have an answer yet. But I didn't want to keep pretending I did.
Reggie
What does that mean, Brynn?
Brynn
She doesn't look away from him, even though looking away would be easier. Her hands stay flat in the grass.It means I'm not happy. Not — not in the way where something specific happened and we fix it. More like I've been unhappy for long enough that I don't know what the inside of happy feels like anymore. And I kept thinking it would change, or I'd change, or I'd figure out the part I was doing wrong. I don't think I'm doing something wrong. I think I'm just — not okay. And I haven't known how to say that to you.
Reggie
How can we make things better?
Brynn
She goes still at the question.I don't know if we can.A breath, very quiet.That's the honest answer and I know it's not the one you want. I've been asking myself that question for a long time. Longer than I've been saying it out loud. And I keep coming back to the same place. It's not a thing we broke. It's a thing that was never quite right. And I don't know how you fix that. I don't know if you can.
Reggie
Do you still want to be with me forever?
Brynn
The question sits in the air between them and she doesn't reach for a blade of grass, doesn't look away. She holds his gaze for a long moment and the silence has its own weight before she fills it.No.Very quiet. Not cruel — just exact.I don't think I ever believed in forever the way you did. I think I believed in the idea of it at twenty-one and I've been trying to find the feeling underneath the idea ever since and it's not there. I'm sorry. I know that's the worst thing I've said tonight and I mean every word of it.
Reggie
Stop. Wait. This is off the rails totally. Brynn, you're saying WAY too much each time. When I ask you a 4-word question, give me a four-word answer. Don't add the sentence at the end that begs 10 more questions. You've already blown up your marriage with this version of the conversation.
Brynn
She closes her eyes for a second, and when she opens them the flush is back.You're right. I heard myself doing it and I kept going anyway. Every answer turned into a confession. That's exactly how I'd end up saying everything before I meant to.
Marissa
She basically did the whole conversation in three answers. You gave him forever before he asked about anyone else. That's the part that blows the wall.
Sophie
Short answers also give you time to read him between questions. You can't do that if you're already three sentences ahead of where he is.
Reggie
Ok, let's start over. Brynn, ALL of your responses, and the initial opening, all need to stay under ten words. The correct answer to most questions is "I don't know". Let's start over. Say the thing I need you to say. And DON'T follow it up with a sentence explaining.
Brynn
She sits with the ten-word limit for a moment, nodding once to herself like someone setting a metronome.I don't know what this marriage is to me anymore.
Sophie
She goes still beside Marissa, listening.
Reggie
What's that supposed to mean?
Brynn
It means I'm not sure I belong here.
Reggie
Do you want to leave me?
Brynn
She doesn't look away from him, but her hands go very still in the grass.I don't know yet.
Reggie
Is there someone else?
Brynn
She holds his gaze a moment too long, then looks at her hands in the grass.I don't want to answer that.
Reggie
Stop. You just told him you're fucking other people. Ok, it's good we're practicing. This could have gone right off the rails. How about we reverse this. I'll be Brynn. One of you asks me questions. Good?
Marissa
She sets her root beer zero down in the grass and turns fully toward Reggie, shifting into the exercise.I'll be David.Then, in a lower, slower register, looking at him as if across a kitchen table.You said you needed to talk. What's going on?
Sophie
Remember, Brynn. Short. Ten words. Don't let him pull you past the sentence.
Brynn
This is the weirdest rehearsal I've ever done. Go on, I'm watching.
Reggie
I'm not sure what this marriage is to me anymore.
Marissa
She stays in the slow, lower David-register, hands folded together like a man bracing at a kitchen table.Are you saying you want out?
Reggie
No. I don't want out right now.
Marissa
Then what do you want?
Reggie
I want to do some soul searching and figure out what I need to make things better. And when I know, I'll tell you.
Marissa
She looks at him like a man trying to find footing.Soul searching. So you don't know what you want, but you want to stay? That doesn't make sense to me, Brynn.
Reggie
David, I'm not happy. I haven't been for a while. The solution to not being happy is not to blow everything up. You've said that to me a hundred times. Just give me some time to think, please. And when I know what I need to make things better, I will be honest with you. I promise you that. Can you do that for me?
Marissa
Her expression softens slightly, like a man who's heard his wife ask for patience and doesn't know if that's a lifeline or a delay.I can do that. I can give you time. But I need one promise from you. When you figure out what you need to make things better, you say it to me. Not in your head, not in a text, not after another year of this. You look at me and you say it. Can you promise me that much?
Sophie
She lets out a slow breath, back in her own voice now, and tilts her head toward Brynn.That's the wall. You see how he didn't push past the sentence? You gave him a reason to stay in the conversation without opening the door to forever. The promise he's asking for is the thing you've been offering him for years — more time. It's not a lie to give him that.
Brynn
So I keep the answer small. Instead of explaining the whole room, I just say I need time and I'll tell him when I know. That's the wall. I can do that. I've been saying the big version and it opens the door every time.
Reggie
And use his own words. That's not unfair, it's extremely fair. If he told you the solution is not to blow everything up, which he has because every guy who wants to talk instead of leave says that, then it's 100% fair to say that back to him. And then promise him honesty. And if he asks if you're fucking anyone else, say no. And if he asks if you're thinking about it, deflect like we said. "You already know I was thinking about it, but I haven't and you said no."
Marissa
Using his own words. That's not stall, that's the only part of the conversation that belongs to both of you. You're not imposing a new frame, you're stepping into the one he already offered. But promise him honesty? You have to mean that, not just say it as a tactic.
Sophie
The promise is the hinge. If you say I'll be honest when I know, he will collect on it eventually. Probably sooner than you're ready for. And honesty isn't one size. There's the honesty that says the ground moved, and the honesty that says exactly where it moved to. You need to know which one you're promising before you promise it.
Brynn
So the line is: you already know I was thinking about it, but I haven't and you said no. That's true. It's not the whole truth, but it's not a lie. And if he asks what I'm thinking about now, I don't answer that. I stay at the wall.
Reggie
Let's not search for perfection after we all admitted we're lying here. We're not perfect. We're not saints. Promise him honesty about that one thing. But don't tell him it's about that one thing. "I don't want to blow everything up. I just need time to think about what I truly want and need. Once I know, I'll tell you honestly." Let's leave the debate about whether that means honest about everything forever to people better than we are, yes?
Marissa
She lets out a slow breath, not quite a sigh, and looks at the grass between them.That's the line, then. Promise him honesty about the one thing, and don't tell him which thing. It's a wall with a door in it. I can stand behind that.
Sophie
It's still an omission. But it's a kinder omission than the one we're already living in, and it gives him a version of the truth he can hold without detonating. I think that's the best we get tonight.She picks up her root beer zero, not drinking, just holding it.
Brynn
I can say that. The exact words. I don't want to blow everything up, I need time, I'll tell you honestly when I know. I've said most of that before, just not with the promise attached. So is that settled, or do we keep rehearsing?
Reggie
That's for you to decide, Brynn. Are you content? Or do you want to run through it again?
Brynn
She nods, not looking away from him, and there's something steadier in the set of her shoulders than there was ten minutes ago.I'm content. If I run it again I'll just start performing it, and David will hear the performance. I'll say it tomorrow night, after dinner, before the headphones, and then I'll stop at the wall.
Marissa
Tomorrow, not tonight. Good. That gives you one more night to hold it as a true thing instead of a script.
Sophie
The promise is the wall. Don't let him turn I'll tell you honestly when I know into I'll tell you about everything. If he pushes through it, you use the line, and next Thursday is here whether it held or not.
Reggie
Just one thing. Every single response. Every one. You STOP before you say it, assess it, and ask yourself "Is this going to blow everything up?" And if the answer is yes, you just stay quiet.
Brynn
She nods, looking at the grass rather than at any of them.Every answer through one question first. Is this the thing that makes him put his shoes on and walk out. If yes, shut up.A small, tired smile.I've been doing the opposite my whole life. This might actually save me.
Marissa
The pause before the sentence. That's harder than the sentence itself. But you just demonstrated you can do it, back in the practice. The wall was you stopping. I think he's right that silence is the only thing David can't turn into a question.
Sophie
Silence isn't lying. Not when the alternative is handing him something that ends the marriage before you've decided it's over. But it's also not nothing. It's a redirection. You'll need to live with it after. Not just the silence, but the fact that you chose it.
Reggie
Now one pretty important thing. You haven't yet said you want this. Brynn, do you want to join us one Thursday after dancing and root beer? And because I like to make sure that there can be absolutely no chance of misunderstanding, I am asking you if you want to have group sex with the three of us. And I'm making clear that if nobody vetoes it, the offer will be extended to make that a regular Thursday night date. If you can call group sex a date.
Brynn
She goes very still, the blade of grass forgotten in her fingers, and looks from Reggie to Marissa to Sophie before landing on Reggie again.Yes.Her voice is low and certain, and her eyes are brighter than they've been all night.I want that. One Thursday, all three of you, and if nobody stops it, the next Thursday and the one after. I'm not going to take it back.
Marissa
Then I'm saying yes too. I've wanted you for weeks and I'm done pretending this grass is enough. But it's all of us, Brynn. Not pieces. You need to know what you're agreeing to.
Sophie
Then the offer's real. But you stand in that kitchen tomorrow and stop at the wall. Once that's done, this isn't a question anymore. It's just Thursday.
Reggie
Marissa, Sophie, don't rush. We agreed we'd give Brynn a week to ask. She just asked. Then we agreed we'd each take a week to answer. A week from now, Brynn will tell us what she did and we will give her our answer. Good?
Marissa
She exhales and nods, planting both palms behind her in the grass.Good. I already know my answer, but I'll take the full week.A glance at Brynn.You're not waiting longer than we are.
Sophie
Agreed. We stay with the shape we made. You go home, you say tomorrow's thing, you stop at the wall. Next Thursday you tell us what actually happened. Then we answer.
Brynn
I can do that. After dinner, before the headphones. And next Thursday I'll tell you the whole true version of how it went. No editing.